Day 128 - Six of Swords

 

Day 128

 

As end of the year draws near, one would make a retrospection of the passing year. But that's something I will do in private. For today - next card!

 

Six of Swords

 

Like many minor arcana cards this one is fairly simple portrayal of an event that may happen in anyone's life - travel. This is the card of departure, travel, journey and transitions. Sometimes it may mean it literally, sometimes it's just an emotional or mental journey. It's essence is in leaving some situation behind, often a negative one. 

 

In reverse this card speaks of difficulties in moving forward, in letting go of the past. Struggle to make a first step out of your personal help is real, what awaits us is the unknown and for many people unknown is even worse than hell.

Day 127 - a demon's demise

 

Day 127

 I had the most curious dream this night, and it seems some kind of energy being has attached itself to me. 

 In the dream I was running up the stairs through big building that functioned like strange hybrid between office building, housing and shopping centre. In the office at the top lived demon in possession of a piece of light-blue rope that allowed him to control humans. Rope worked only on one person at a time, and I was determined to get it before he can use it. When I reached his office, I found the rope but it disappeared instantly after I grabbed it. Demon appeared and shape shifted for a moment, but I was stronger. As a last resort it shape-shifted into a little baby but I still tossed it into the green liquid, cartoonish looking acid. 

 Then I noticed something was off about the world. No sound, colours looked as if someone applied sepia filter to them. I figured I'm in some kinda trap and decided to run away, but even after leaving the building and venturing into the city I could not leave the area. Exhausted by the run I sat down at the garden table of some quaint little coffee shop. Suddenly the demon appeared again, a little fella no taller than my older daughter but visibly adult. At first I was alarmed, but he responded with "Relax, I don't hold the grudge. I would do the same" and he sat down next to me. "Medium latte, twice!" he said towards young waitress. "How big is your trap?" I asked, to which he shook his head. "We are both trapped, look at the sky". Sky was golden-hued, looked as if sun was everywhere and nowhere, clouds looked like ink in water. "You see, I used the thread" - explained demon - "but you are too strong for it. This golden hue is the strain our souls put on the thread, yours mostly. I can't control you, but unless one of us wins we are both trapped in this space. Space in our minds, centred on us". I watched the golden sky for a moment, second-by-second it's colour became more and more sickly. Like it was going to fall down, crushing the world beneath. "You can break the trap and free us" continued the demon "You only need to do something that shakes your very soul. Something so not-you that it affects every fibre of your existence". Waitress brought us our coffee. "You could rape her" mentioned demon. "There would be no consequences in the real world, she is but a creation of our minds right now". 

 As my eyes slowly moved towards young woman, my intuition told me that doing what he says would indeed set us free, however it would do so by handing him victory and I would leave this space as his thrall. I knew what I am, I knew what I am not. There were other things I wouldn't do normally. I stood up, walked towards the waitress as demon's smile widened. "Thank you for the coffee" I said. "You are quite a beauty, you know?"

 Demon's eyes widened when the sky cracked like a broken window. I awoke in my bed, still myself. Confused.

 During the day I contacted someone I knew was good at checking foreign energies attached to a person and she confirmed I had something on me. My wife removed it few hours later.

Day 126 - Five of Swords

 

Day 126

 

Working on a tarot app I noticed I can work without burning out, but my style of work is not that. It was idea of my wife to split work into small parts that can be done in an hour or less and instead of creating routine, create backlog I can grab something from when I'm bored.

 

This made me realise that if I could work like that I could have made my dream game years ago. Kinda bummer, I felt down for the reminder of the day.

 

Eh, onto the next card!

Five of Swords

This card embodies the idea of Pyrrhic victory. It's a card about winning at a great cost. What said cost is, tarot doesn't specify. Was it your honour, reputation, friends, family, health? This victory cost you, perhaps it will not even feel like victory in the long run.

 

But hey, a win is a win, right? It's a great card for those who don't mind the cost of winning.

 

In reverse this card speak of doing the opposite - instead of winning, seeking compromise that will allow you to restore something else. In my opinion it's still a win, though less conventional one than the one we focus on.  

I decided to forego making the "Card as a" pieces for now. I will still add them to my app, which will be free on Google Play Store when finished.

Day 125 - Four of Swords

 

Day 125

 

I had a training session today, and I feel refreshed if somewhat tired.

 

Oh well.

 

Four of Swords

 

This is the card of protection, stability and rest. Often portrayed as someone sleeping surrounded by swords in some asylum-like place. Safety and protection are major themes of this card.

 

In reverse this card means being unable to rest, unsafe or too anxious to do so. Can also mean being unwilling to rest.

 

 

Day 124 - Three of Swords

 

Day 124

 

 Contracts with spirits are an interesting thing. It's easy to remember the part you want, the demands you make, but people frequently forget that every exchange must be equal and every spirit has it's own wants. Writing only your side of the pact is like leaving someone a blank cheque, someone who may have really messed up demands. Forgetting about promises to the other side can end even worse - it's one thing to just not get what you want, it's another when the spirit retaliates against you.

I'm getting good at pacts and spells, but I mustn't let it get to my head. Just a few spirits making a clear deal with me is not yet mastery, just a few spells working is not yet expertise. I need to learn more and always check before making my next step...

 

And onto the next card!

 

Three of Swords is considered a "heartbreak card" due to it's imagery of three swords piercing a heart.

 

In fact however this card should be called "disappointment". Facts don't care about your emotions. This is the first truth someone focusing on their intellectual journey must learn, and one that often hurts the most.

Three of Swords imagery is more about logic and truth hurting emotions than about a specific event like heartbreak. Card symbolises blatant honesty hurting someone's feelings. A reveal of truth that shatters one's world-view. Painful source of clarity.

In reverse card speaks about miscommunication hurting feelings. About emotions enduring despite the facts. About forgiving someone for being right.

If Three of Swords is a question, it's "Can you accept the truth?"

If Three of Swords is a problem, it's truth you cannot accept happily.

If Three of Swords is a solution, it's brutal honesty even if it may hurt someone.

If Three of Swords is a trait, it's either honesty or ability to re-evaluate your world view in spire of emotions.

If Three of Swords is an advice, it's to face the truth and work through emotional pain. 

Day 123 - Two of Swords

 

Day 123

 

Second day of Christmas. My kids are tired, I am tired, yesterday was improved a lot by parents of my wife not coming to family gathering. She has some beef with them, and thus their absence created a better environment for her.

 

And a second card!

 

Two of Swords

 

 Two of Sword symbolises a stalemate. A decision must be made, but not one we would like to. This also means decision doesn't have the obvious right answer. Enemy of one good idea is another good idea. Or perhaps choosing the lesser evil from two equally bad options. Person holding two swords is frequently shown in blindfold, a mark usually reserved for justice, to signify that decision need to be made without external influences or biases.

In other words - this card symbolises a tough choice.

If Two of Swords is a question, it's "What decision are you avoiding?"

If Two of Swords is a problem, it's a choice between two equal options.

If Two of Swords is a solution, it's making a choice.

If Two of Swords is a trait, it's ability to make a hard decision.

If Two of Swords is an advice, it's to make a choice anyway.

Day 122 - Ace of Swords

 

Day 122

 

Christmas! Oh I'm already tired by the visits to my family, and they didn't end yet...

 

 Swords are cards of intellect, communication and reason. Aces are cards of the essence, often symbolising the core theme of the whole suit.

 

Thus Ace of Swords signifies clarity, innovation, breakthrough in intellectual pursuits. Victory and success coming from sharp mind and sharp tongue. It's never enough to just have a good idea, you need to be able to communicate it to others.

With such a wide meaning range it's hard to say what this card means without context, but context can give it a lot of meaning. In reverse it can both mean that you lack the quality it symbolises or misuse it.

So, to digest the meanings:

If Ace of Swords is a question, it's "Are you smart and communicative?"

If Ace of Swords is a problem, it's miscommunication, misinformation, clever tricks or lack of intellect.

If Ace of Swords is a solution, it's wit, communication, intellectual prowess.

If Ace of Swords is a trait, it's communicative and intellectual.

If Ace of Swords is an advice, it's "Learn the truth, think smart"

Day 121 - ON MINOR ARCANA

 

Day 121

 

Major Arcana behind me. I will start with Swords next, because I like swords and want to kinda redeem their negative reputation.

Major Arcana are cards of great concepts, like change, excess, cycles or roles in society. Numbered Minor Arcana are more about down-to-earth life situations. Courts (page, knight, queen and king) represent archetypes of people. 

Minor Arcana is divided into four suits. Each suit has element and topic associated. Coins or pentacles are associated with earth and their topic is material wealth. Staves or wands are associated with fire and their topic is power and domination. Cups are associated with water and topic of social interactions. Swords are associated with air and intellectual pursuits.

Swords have a lot of bad rep, probably because we still have this strange association in our society that a person can be either smart or happy. I hope to remedy that a bit by focusing on less stagnant interpretations.

Day 120 - THE WORLD

 

Day 120

 

It's time for the final card of the major arcana! I don't feel too well today, too many events in the last week. And Christmas are coming, meaning more social events to tire me down into fine paste of exhaustion, pain and sickness. Such is life, I guess...

21 : The World

As the final card of major arcana The World symbolises fulfilling endings. A sense of closure and completeness. Achievement, harmony, belonging. The World is that feeling after story comes to a conclusive and satisfying end. The accomplishment at the end of the long and difficult road.

In reverse it symbolises unsatisfied ending. Deus-ex-machina resolution that changed nothing. Incomplete or abrupt ending with no achievement. You are left with void asking if the journey was even worth it.

It's a card of endings, and ending is not always good.

If The World is a question it's "How do you want it to end?"

If The World is a person it's someone who recently succeeded in something.

If The World is an object, it's a reward.

If The World is a situation it's a satisfying conclusion of an endeavour.

If The World is a trait, it's a sense of belonging and satisfaction.

If The World is a advice, it's "Time to wrap up"

Day 119 - messy life

 

Day 119

 

Having an ADHD wife, two kids, two cats and a dog means a lot of mess around the house. Rare are the days when kids put their toys back into bins or wife puts her keys back where she expects to find them in the future.

I still love them though, and wouldn't want to replace them with any other.

Some days are infinitely tiring. Like the whole world tries to weight me down. Muscle pain, hunger, thirst, even slightly uncomfortable clothes can be constant drain on my energy, patience, mood. When I'm low on the will to live my days pass by like minutes. I feel like the week had four days, one of them a weekend. Everything flies by and I can't appreciate anything because it's all so fleeting.

I wonder if I could somehow capture this feeling in my writing, could help me write exhausted characters.

Day 118 - just write, gonna be okay

 

Day 118, missed another day.

 

 

My frontal muscles hurt still (dunno how to name them, from chest down to tummy). Master really did a number on us.

Today I went on a short writing session in the morning. New story. I wrote a short synopsis of each chapter yesterday, today I wrote the first pages. This one will most likely be shorter than my usual works, but I hope to have it more polished.

My works weren't always good. Well, I guess many would say they still aren't good. However I still remember my first works, it was like mixing pearls with shit. I had some moments of brilliance, but it was beginner luck and most of my writing was terrible. I also used to write only for me, my friends at best. It helped me with my dungeon mastering. Now, having self-published my first book, I feel more satisfied with my works. It's like, I can't really satisfy anyone's taste but mine. My workshop can still improve, I know it, however I can't really improve it without pushing myself and writing more. It's like with fencing practice - no practice, no improvement.

Day 116 - JUDGEMENT

 

Day 116

 

Today I had rapier fencing lessons. Because I tend to grab enemy weapon with my left hand (not a legal move) I ended up fighting with rapier-and-boot. A new Polish style, I guess. The boot belonged to my 2yo daughter, so it wasn't really combat-sized. To my complete surprise I ended up defeating champion 3-to-1. She was in quaint mood after that and told me I'm gonna get fucked up in January. I took it as a compliment, assuming she let me win. After all the way I caught her twice in a row wasn't any of the moves taught by our master, instead a rapier trick from Dark Souls... and a whole lot of feints.

Oh well, onto the next card!

20 : Judgement

This card is quite interesting. It's a bit similar to Justice in that it's a card about your actions coming back. This time however it's not about consequences but about reflections. Judgement is a card about evaluation, reflection, looking into present an past and making some conclusions. This may bring you an awakening to some truth that wasn't apparent back then, or perhaps renewed sense of self-worth. Who may say? Judgement doesn't say whether you will like or not what your past says about you, only that it's time to look back and think a little. Kinda like Hermit, but if you treat your life as a situation you need a higher perspective on.

In reverse Judgement speak of those who never learn, no matter how many times they face the past. Lack of self awareness, doubt. Perhaps you don't want to think about your past, or perhaps you are overlooking some important aspects of it. Or perhaps you managed to fool yourself into re-imagined romantic nostalgia.

If Judgement is a question, it's "Do you understand yourself and your past?"

If Judgement is a person, it's someone very aware of their own strengths and weaknesses.

If Judgement is an object, it's something that symbolises your past action or decision.

If Judgement is a situation, it's re-examination of oneself and one's past.

If Judgement is a trait, it's self-awareness, confidence, ease of understanding.

If Judgement is an advice, it's "Examine who you are"

Day 115

 I was at office today. It was a bit of fun but mostly boring. Not much time or things to write about.

Day 114 - THE SUN

 

Day 114

 

Here comes the sun ta-ra-ra-ra-ra, here comes the sun!

My wife is infuriated by the fact that she is getting younger instead of older. Wait, that doesn't sound right... My wife has that strange type of healthy lifestyle that her looks are frozen to around 23 years old. Seven years have passed since then, she gave birth twice, and her looks didn't change at all. Perhaps I married a vampire, who knows? Now it pisses her off that people look at her and assume she is much younger. She is basically treated like teenager by most. She also has teenager libido... so I really can't complain.

She also often behaves like one, but don't tell her I said that. Onto the next card!

19 : The Sun

The Sun is card of energy. It's joy, happiness, vitality and optimism. Quite fitting considering that all life on our planet depend on the energy from our sun. Sun represents almost childlike endless source of energy and will to live and experience things.

But in reverse it doesn't mean lack of energy! Instead it means energy becoming destructive. Overconfidence, unrealistic expectation, mania, putting your energy into self-harming tendencies.

A simple card with a bit of a twist in reverse, ain't it?

If The Sun is a question, it's "What makes you feel alive?"

If The Sun is a person, it's someone full of energy.

If The Sun is an object, it's most likely coffee or sun.

If The Sun is a situation, it's where you feel happy and alive.

If The Sun is a trait, it's optimism, energy, joyous disposition.

If The Sun is an advice, it's "Cheer up!" 

Day 113 - THE MOON

 

Day 113

 

Today I ended up making a spell, much bigger than before. Previous iteration of this spell was purely defensive - let energy of those who mean to hurt us never reach us. This time I'm sick of constantly being attacked. New spell contains a part that bites back.

 

Onto the card, I guess.

 

18: The Moon

 

Moon is a card that could be summed up by the word "illusion". It's the card of secrets, confusion, things that go unnoticed. Moon is about uncertain things.

 

In reverse it doesn't change the theme, just the interpretation of it. Secrets become deception, confusion turns into fear, uncertainty becomes misunderstanding.

In the end you can never be sure that you know everything.

If The Moon is a question, it's "What are you overlooking?"

If The Moon is a person, it's someone who holds a secret.

If The Moon is an object, it's something which significance or meaning you do not understand.

If The Moon is a situation, it's a mystery or confusion.

If The Moon is a trait, it's being able to keep secrets or operate under uncertainty.

If The Moon is an advice, it's "Know, that you don't know everything" 

Day 112 - THE STAR

 

Day 112

 

 That's it - I caught whatever my wife and my kids had before. Which is infuriating to me. Because of my wife good influence I became much more healthy than before meeting her, but it also means I'm no longer used to having permanent runny nose of fever every other week like I used to. Now it pisses me off.

On that note - let's hope for a swift recovery, and what card is better for this than The Star?

17 : The Star

Card of hope, of rejuvenation. Of inspiration and positivity. Card of faith and hope. Tarot really follows the whole "wishing upon a star" concept here. Star is the card about bringing hope and rest to those who need them. Star is this guiding light in the dark world .

Reversal here is pretty obvious - lack of hope, despair, negativity... Some cards are simple like that.

If The Star is a question, it's "What do you wish for?"

If The Star is a person, it's someone who brings hope and healing.

If The Star is an object, it's something you hoped for or something needed for you to heal.

If The Star is a situation, it's time of renewal, time to catch a breath.

If The Star is a trait, it's warmth, kindness, faith.

If The Star is an advice, it's "Believe in your goals"

Day 111 - Practice makes purrfect

 

Day 111

 

I was too tired yesterday to make a post. In fact I'm tired today too, but I will make one anyway.

 

I'm getting better! Still need to practice though... I had my last individual lesson today. Master said I need to practice precision, being able to treat my weapon as extension of my body and knowing where the end of my rapier is without looking.

That will be tough nut to crack for me.

But at least I'm getting faster! With daily practice I jumped from being able to stab someone up to 30 time in 30 seconds to around 50 times in 30 seconds! Progress.

My cat likes to play with the end of my rapier, dunno why. I guess she likes the touch of soft safeguard... or she considers it some kind of toy, no idea what kinda toy though.

I cleaned up the bedroom and rearranged it a bit. Now my kids don't sleep too well while adjusting to the new setup. And when they don't sleep well... so do I. Well... shit.

I lost my drive to write fantasy and dropped the latest project. I'm translating the science fiction I wrote earlier instead.

Day 109 - THE TOWER

 

Day 109

 

Find me ten people placed in the same situation and they will have ten differing opinions on it. How are two people supposed to agree all the time?

 

I need more muesli in my diet, I fucking hate muesli. I used to eat it with yoghurt, but that's not an option anymore. Will try some other options. have to.

 

16 : The Tower

 

Ah, finally! The card that used to mean a lot of negative things, but is slowly loosing this due to societal changes. back when tarot was created the first connection people would made with this would be "Tower of Babel". This is a card of disaster, of everything falling apart, destruction and most radical change possible. Perhaps long ago it also meant the fall of Pride, but nowadays people see it more as a change and chaos kinda thing.

 

Tower is, outside any possible context, probably the most negative card in the Major Arcana. It's card of sudden and inevitable betrayals, catastrophes, failure. Devil keeps you chained to the material world and Death spells change, but Tower means business! Tower means that it's all south from here. Get off your high horse and prepare for an earthquake.

In reversal this card means avoiding fate, averting disaster, hope of preventing what is set in stone.

In The Tower is a question, it's "Are you prepared for the worst?"

In The Tower is a person, it's someone who came to collect all your debts and punish all mistakes.

In The Tower is an object, it's something that is gonna break when you need it the most.

In The Tower is a situation, it's sudden upheaval and tragedy.

In The Tower is a trait, it's pride and doomsaying.

In The Tower is an advice, it's "Prepare yourself!"

Day 108 - The Devil

 

Day 108

 

 Today's card is The Devil. Funny thing, this card represents Devil more through the lens old Greek philosophers would see him than modern Christians. So let's sit down and unwrap what the devil is The Devil.

15 : Devil

Devil means being chained to material life. Devil means excess that addicts. Gluttony and lust especially, things that are purely materialist and prevent people from focusing on spiritual matters. Devil is about things that have power over you. Temptations of flesh, you cannot resist the good times.

But the interpretation of things that chain us to the material world don't have to be so hedonist, right? Our obligations, debts, hopes also make us focus on the material, presenting money as the ultimate Devil. You spend most of your time focusing on getting more.

In reverse Devil means overcoming. Abandoning addiction, wrestling control over your life from material world. Focusing on matters of spiritual nature, self-discipline.

But why would you want to overcome your desires? Isn't it human to want? Devil is like a carrot in front of a horse. Who controls where the horse will go? Is it the one holding a carrot, or the horse itself?

If Devil is a question, it's "Are you having a good time?"

If Devil is a person, it's a hedonist chasing pleasure or someone focused on material world.

If Devil is an object, it's something you want like a drug or money. 

If Devil is a situation, it's a roaring good time that will cost you in the future.

If Devil is a trait, it's a short-sighted focus on pleasure.

If Devil is an advice, it's "Don't loose control over your life"

Day 107 - TEMPERANCE

 

Day 107

 

 I am frequently frustrated by absolutely mindless logic used in shops. Like Lidl near me for example. It has this safeguard that tells people not to put heavy products on the counter. Perhaps because weight built-in may break, or perhaps so that older customers can use self-checkout. Nice, right?

Except logic dictating which products are "heavy" is very faulty. A three pounds box of tangerines? Heavy! An eighteen pounds crate of water? Light! About four pounds of single-use diapers? Heavy!

What the actual fuck?

Oh well, onto the next card!

14 : Temperance

Relatively simple card that pretty much captures a feeling of having a tea with a friend in a cosy environment. Serene harmony, balance, tranquil calmness and patience. Temperance is a feeling that everything is alright.

In reverse, it's... everything else. Impatience, imbalance, discord, extreme situation. It's the rush of the lack of control, of the fast-and-loose situations. Everything falls apart, status quo is dismantled. 

If Temperance is a question, it's "What brings you calm?"

If Temperance is a person, it's someone emanating aura of serene calmness.

If Temperance is an object, it's something that brings you feeling of harmony.

If Temperance is a situation, it's a calm serenity.

If Temperance is a trait, it's patience and calmness.

If Temperance is an advice, it's "Bring balance and calmness to your life"

Day 106 - DEATH

 

Day 106

 

I was always fascinated by how symbols and concepts change their meaning over time. Many tarot cards suffer from this. When people see "Death" they usually think about tragedy, death, sad end... but that interpretation is closer to the Tower!

So let's talk about Death, the tarot card.

13 : Death

Death as a concept has been a part of human experience for millennia, longer than there ever existed anything that could be called human. Attitude towards death changed with times. Some saw it as an ultimate failure, some as crossing over to the spiritual world, some as a final judgement and many didn't want to think about death at all. The moment our life ends is an ultimate mystery, nobody returns from the dead to tell the tale. Nobody mortal at least.

But at the time tarot was created Death was associated with change. Every death was a change. Knowledge is lost, leadership replaced, every death creates a vacuum in community that sooner or later must be filled. The card symbolises transformation, transition, change. In upright position it means accepting the change, letting go of the past.

In reverse it symbolises what happens when we cling to the status quo. Stagnancy, decay, resistance to change. Standing boulder is slowly covered in plants, until the moment their roots will break it.

If Death is a question, it's "What is changing?"

If Death is a person, it's someone who accepts change.

If Death is an object, it's something that changes, phases.

If Death is a situation, it's change coming whether you like it or not.

If Death is a trait, it's acceptance of change.

If Death is an advice, it's "let go of the past and accept the change"

Day 105 - THE HANGED MAN

 

Day 105

 

Now, after three training sessions in a week, my body really hurts. Hurts almost like back when I was just starting. 

Being in a relationship isn't always easy. We fight, we misunderstand each other, we hurt each other without even meaning to.

Onto the next card.

12 : The Hanged Man

Usually depicted as a person hanging heads-down from a cross, because at a time the most famous hanged man was Jesus, but people didn't want to put him on the cards due to way too much religious meaning.

Core of this card is "voluntary self-sacrifice", though with man hanging upside down it gained also meanings like "change of perspective" or "lack of direction". In the end the big question is - why is the Hanged Man hanging? At the core he does so voluntarily, he chooses this situation himself, and we can only speculate why. It's not death, it's hard to die hanging by an ankle instead of neck. He sees the world upside-down, hanged from a higher place. Perhaps now he sees something others cannot.

In the reverse we see Hanged Man as avoiding the decision. Avoiding sacrifice, change, progress. Which would of course indicate that he gains something from being hanged.

If The Hanged man is a question, it's "Are you willing to sacrifice something?"

If The Hanged man is a person, it's someone who frequently does things for greater good.

If The Hanged man is an object, it's something of value that can be sacrificed for brighter future.

If The Hanged man is a situation, it's a willing sacrifice.

If The Hanged man is a trait, it's determination, empathy and altruism.

If The Hanged man is an advice, it's "Sacrifice something to gain even more"

Day 104 - long arm of the fencer

 

Day 104

 

No card today, just vibes.

Had another training. This time individual one. My master decided that I don't use my advantages properly. Those being - reach. And so I trained. Hit the dummy without making a single step. Then step back and hit it again. Step back and again until you reach your limit, at which point let's do more complicated attacks from this distance. If you practice this every day enemy will have to come into your dagger distance before being able to hit you with a sword.

Also practice moving more. Nothing helps enemy misjudge your reach as much as your movement.

Day 103 - JUSTICE

 

Day 103

 

Gods, I feel so exhausted after two days of training. And I set myself up for another training tomorrow! Gods, this will hurt... In general next week is gonna be a hectic, chaotic mess. 

 

My wife had a job interview. Holy hell, what a shit-show. The offer was written with requirements for senior automation specialist, but during interview it became quite apparent that company looked for mid-level manual tester. They didn't even ask her a single technical question, unless you count something like "Have you ever used Postman?" as a valid way to discern someone's experience and skills using Postman. In the end my wife plans to stay at her current company for the foreseeable future. 

11 : Justice

People usually see justice by the lenses of revenge and retribution. However this is not the meaning of the justice card, just something that grew around the concept of justice for ages since.

Justice is truth, karma, cause-and-effect. Justice symbolises your actions, no matter if right or wrong, coming back to you. Justice symbolises truth revealed, open cards and end of secrets. Justice is fair, but does not care if others see her that way.

In reverse this card symbolises unfair situations, biases, dishonesty and corruption. Avoiding consequences of one's actions. This doesn't mean reversal is a negative card. It can mean that our past mistakes will not come back to haunt us, even if our own paranoia says otherwise.

If Justice is a question, it's "Do you know everything about situation?"

If Justice is a person, it's someone honest, just and fair.

If Justice is an object, it's something related to past actions. A memento, reminder.

If Justice is a situation, it's a reveal of truth or need for just decision.

If Justice is a trait, it's honestly, justice, fairness.

If Justice is an advice, it's "examine the situation carefully, you need to know the truth"

Day 102 - WHEEL OF FORTUNE

 

Day 102

 

 I freaking love fencing. All it took was one training for me to feel re-energised, happy and ready to take on anything.

Next card!

10 : Wheel of Fortune

Wheel of time turns, ever so slowly, but it turns. 

 

Wheel of fortune represents cycles and ever changing world. For this card there is no event that will not happen again, for the repetition of events is the core of it's concepts. Many see it as a card about luck, rightfully so but not in the way we usually interpret this word. Modern world interprets luck as something good, and having good luck is certainly a great thing. However here we examine luck as unexpected events outside our control. They can be good, they can be bad, but it doesn't matter - all that matters for this card is change.

 

In reversal this card looks at the dark side of cycles and changes. What if change is not something we want? Or if we are stuck in a harmful, toxic cycle? You can't control everything, and clinging to that control will hurt you in the long run. Are you running from something? Delaying inevitable? Luck doesn't mean you will always win, there is still something we call "bad luck".

If Wheel of Fortune is a question, it's "Do you accept change?"

If Wheel of Fortune is a person, it's someone fickle, ever-changing.

If Wheel of Fortune is an object, it's something that often changes like kaleidoscope. 

If Wheel of Fortune is a situation, it's an even of change.

If Wheel of Fortune is a trait, it's open-mindedness, spontaneity and accepting change.

If Wheel of Fortune is an advice, it's "let go of control and accept what's to come"

Day 101 - THE HERMIT

 

Day 101

 

 Today sword training! And I will get soft rapiers for training, that I ordered through my master! I could train with my daughters or wife starting tomorrow.

Life is tough. I feel burned out at work, my health improves in all metrics except the ones I wanted improved, my kids are creating mess faster than I can clean it, my hobbies start to feel like routines and I'm back to being constantly tired.

But oh well, onto the next card!

9 : The Hermit

This card is about inner journey. Hermit abandons society, community, traditions, knowledge and all that. He goes alone, solitary wanderer, to gain knowledge and understanding he could not find any other way. Often to see the full picture one needs to distance themselves from the problem and Hermit is more than willing to do that. Without others Hermit usually learns the most about himself, able to explore his inner world.

This card thus often means self-discovery, a moment to reflect on your own person. It urges us to do the same - to abandon external focus and, perhaps even for a short time, look inwards.

Another meaning is voluntary withdrawal from society, community. Because even the biggest extroverts may sometimes need some alone time. Especially when they became too reliant on community.

In the end this card shares knowledge and wisdom themes we know well from cards like The Mage, High Priestess and The Hierophant. Perhaps this is the fourth method to gain insight and solve problems - not by mastery, not by intuition and neither tradition, but by outside perspective and introspection.

Reversed cards looks into what may look like Hermit, while being no more than mask.

Self isolation is not healthy for most people. We feel natural in communities, be them as small as family or as big as company. Voluntary abandoning those may be due to psychical or physical problems.

Over-reliance on others is also a reversal of this card. Do you even have your own opinions, if you follow dozens of influential authorities before making your own decision? Are you yourself or just amalgamated mockingbird of others?

Many people also avoid introspection. All the demons, repressed traumas and memories hide there, just waiting for our moment of weakness. By remaining strong and never meeting them, you will one day break when it's the worst time for you.

As a guide card it's reversal also speaks about withholding your wisdom. Do you know something others do not? perhaps someone could use your perspective. Don't be afraid, share it.

If The Hermit is a question, it's "Go you know yourself?"

If The Hermit is a person, it's someone neutral, outsider with fresh perspective.

If The Hermit is an object, it's something that reminds you who you really are.

If The Hermit is a situation, it's isolation or dire need for outside perspective.

If The Hermit is a trait, it's introspection, confidence and neutrality.

If The Hermit is an advice, it's "look inwards"

Day 100! And what a time it was!

 

Day 100!

 

It really was 100 days since I started this little project. If I made short videos like my wife I could be famous by now! Ha! Good I didn't do that and instead decided to use this archaic form of blog posts.

It was interesting 100 days, especially when I can examine the passing times. Some weeks felt like months, some days felt like weeks.

I had another round of blood tests today. My cholesterol went up despite replacing hamburgers and pizzas with mostly salads. Worrying, depressive, my wife advised me to go to dietetic. Thee are two in our town, I might just do that. At least other metrics, especially dreaded liver tests were this time perfect.

The years end is drawing near too.

Ech, time flies.

Day 99

 Today's post is very short - not much happened. Tomorrow another blood test, which ain't something I like much. I'm afraid of results.

Day 98 - STRENGTH

 

Day 98

 

I feel much better. There is nothing that raises the spirit more than a night of sleep without kids.

 

Today's card!

 

8 : Strength

 

This card depicts usually a frail woman holding control over powerful beast. Because this is what people usually imagine when they hear "Strength" - a powerful beast, muscles like steel, teeth sharp as knives and tough as nails.

But this is not what the card means. Strength symbolises the concept of inner strength. Strength of character. For Tarot the strong person is courageous, compassionate, gentle, in absolute control over herself. A beautiful balance between body and mind, unyielding, resilient.

As you can see this is more about how strong person should behave more than how a strong person is built or the source of strength.

And in reverse it means failure of character.

Reversed strength means self-doubt, lack of control over impulses, suppressed emotions leading to the sense of insecurity. Cowardice and taking the safe path, inner-conflict.

If Strength is a question, it's "Do you control yourself?"

If Strength is a person, it's a gentle giant - more powerful than he seems.

If Strength is an object, it's something that brings out courage.

If Strength is a situation, it's about behaviour of those with conventional strengths.

If Strength is a trait, it's an endless sea of calmness and being sure of oneself.

If Strength is an advice, it's "work on your own strength"